The Politics of Anger

This week, we elected Rob Ford as mayor of Toronto. If you'd asked anyone, even a few years ago, if they could ever see the day when Rob Ford would win this title, never mind by close to 50% of the vote, they'd think you were mad. It was laughable. Inconceivable! But here we are, 4 days later, shaking our collective heads and wondering what the hell just happened.

In one 5 day period, the inconceivable has become reality, and the fallout has already begun. Apparently unaware he was on a live talk show, Rob spouted an incoherent string of cliches about the dreaded “gravy train” and brought out his favourite old chestnut for the umpteenth time about the “$12,000 retirement party”. The hosts of “As It Happens” were left wondering – did that just happen? Four more years of this to look forward to? But, of course Ford doesn't care what the CBC “elites” think. Sound familiar? Hello Tea Party.

Now don't get me wrong – I don't think elected officials should throw themselves opulent retirement parties, nor do I think that spending at any level of government (witness Harper and his crew, McGuinty) has been responsible for years (if it ever was). But do I think that the answer is to elect a bigoted, contrarian councillor whose only claim to fame has been shooting his mouth off? To quote Jacobim Mugato from the underrated “Zoolander” - I feel like I'm taking crazy pills here.

So what happened? How could something that seemed so impossible just a few years ago become a harsh reality? I've spoken to some Ford supporters. They're not stupid people, they're just angry. They're fed up with everything going up except their salaries. They're fed up with paying ever increasing taxes. They're fed up with wasteful spending at all levels of government. They're fed up of feeling like second class citizens, or worse yet, “rubes” because they have the stupidity to live in the dreaded “burbs” and not downtown. Smart people live in the suburbs too, for many different reasons, not the least of which is to raise their children in a house they can afford. We shouldn't look down our noses at people for wanting a safe neighbourhood with a good school.

But was this really the answer to those problems? Surely we needed an epic, visionary politician who could have cut through all of the nonsense and hold the notion of a thriving, elegant, progressive Toronto that was fair to all of its citizens for the future. A tall order, to be sure, but not impossible.

But we didn't have that candidate.

We had very limited choices. On the one hand we had Rob Ford, spouting catch phrases and not a lot else, much like the recently resurrected Tea Party member Sarah Palin. All taglines, no content. Then we had Smitherman, a man who was so tainted by the eHealth scandal, he probably shouldn't have run at all until folks had forgotten about it. And last but not least, we had Pantalone. Pantalone was so closely aligned with Miller it was impossible for him to win. And to add insult to injury, Pantalone fractured the left wing vote. It's overly simplistic to assume that each Pantalone voter would become a Smitherman voter, but it's quite possible that had Pantalone done the wise and unselfish thing, he would have reluctantly backed Smitherman. Smitherman could have won. He's not perfect, far from it, but I don't think I would have been embarrassed by his representation the way I already am about Ford.

One thing we know about people is that when they get mad, they want change. Any change. It doesn't even have to be for the better – it just has to feel different, like we're doing something. So, while we sit in gridlock traffic, driving to a job where wages remain stubbornly frozen, back to our home which we've overpaid for we get angry. We get fed up. We decide something must change, anything! So we make knee-jerk reactions. We make decisions we later regret. Think about the last time you really lost your temper. Did you make a reasonable, rational judgement in that moment or did you kick the dog?

Sadly, I think Toronto has just kicked the dog. Unfortunately, we're the ones who are going to be whimpering and slinking off into the corner wondering what we did to deserve it.

4 years. It's a lifetime. Just ask any parent of a five year old child.

Here's what I predict will happen: Ford will not be able to repeal the hated Land Transfer Tax, will do more harm than good to the TTC, will not be able to winnow council to 22 members, and will have no idea how to solve the gridlock problem in Toronto. He will lock horns with his mostly moderate and left leaning council and will embarrass us on the public stage multiple times. And this is best case scenario.

But I could be wrong.

Good luck Toronto. We're going to need it.

Why Are We So Angry?

It's been a rough day for human behaviour. In the news today a flight attendant was clocked by a suitcase wielding passenger who refused to sit down before the plane came to a “full and complete stop”. In a fit of pique, no doubt preceded by a myriad of soul destroying insults, the JetBlue attendant grabbed a couple of beers and launched the emergency slide, slipping into the freedom of the wide open tarmac. Whee!

A young woman desperate for chicken nuggets first thing in the morning pummelled a few beleagured fast food workers who were just trying to serve breakfast. The depth and fury of her rage is staggering – if you watch the video you can only assume that either she has gone off the deep end, or is under the influence of some fairly powerful pharmaceuticals.

A bench clearing brawl saw the entire roster of both the Cincinati Reds and the St. Louis Cardinals wrestling and struggling in a sea of fists and elbows. The brouhaha was such a disaster that officials could have either ended the game, or throw both the managers out and leave the hooligans on the field. Millions and millions of dollars of horse meat risked life, limb and their careers for a relatively minor altercation.

So what's got us so pissed?

Every generation feels that “life has gone mad” that “things are much worse now than they were then”; all of us remember the past with nostalgia and forget how things really were. Historically, the turn of a century leads to much angst about the state of “modern” life. Millenarianism is nothing new.

But does that tell the whole truth? Is it not possible that our lives, at this point in history, have reached a point of desperation and frustration that is unprecedented? Best case scenario? Most of us toil in jobs we don't like or struggle to get a job we won't like, pay massive mortgages on homes we cannot afford, carry debt for things we do not need and sit in traffic that makes us wish our lives away. We are expected to be reachable, in contact, in conversation almost 24 hours a day. The level of noise in our lives has hit ear splitting levels. With Torontonians facing 90 minute commutes, homes that range from 5-9 times our average incomes and daily disruptions that make our already busy city completely gridlocked, it's a small miracle that there aren't more outbursts. We are stretched to our breaking point. And sometimes, we snap.

The sad thing is we turn on each other, instead of on the real issue.

We run roughshod over another person because our lives are so out of balance that the perceived win of being a “few minutes early” or “avoiding a lineup” is more important than another human being. What we need to understand is why are we in such a big hurry? Who asked us to perform our lives at this pace? Why do we let it happen?

We abuse a service person because we cannot get what we want when we want it. What is it that has us feeling so low and out of control of our lives that this is the only way we can satisfy ourselves or feel important? When did chicken nuggets replace meaning?

We get road rage, speed, tailgate, and endanger our fellow man because we feel trapped. How did we get ourselves into the job, the mortgage, the commute and the debt in the first place? Why don't our bankers feel the pinch?

We're angry alright, but we're angry with ourselves. We did this to ourselves.

So how do we undo it?

There is a sense, in the world, right now, of a crossroads, of a choice for change that has to be entered into willingly. There has to be a better way to live our lives, with peace and respect for our fellow humans, free from the simmering rage that appears to be just below the surface everywhere we look. I have to think this same way would have less of an impact on our environment and ourselves.

I'm not sure what that is yet, but I'll keep you posted.

Why Are We So Disconnected?

I've had a run of experiences lately that have made me see how disconnected we've all become from each other. From the mundane to the egregious, it seems that as a group, we've stopped caring about each other and really don't seem to recognize the invisible thread that connects us all.

In the last six months we've been challenged by two moves. Now I know that all of you have moving horror stories; at the best of times moving is a stressful, heart rending experience. What really struck me this time was how many things went wrong; how many “balls were dropped” or jobs were left half done. These weren't bad people, these were people that didn't see any connection between what they did and how it affected the person on the other side.

I realize these are hardly earth shattering problems, but they illustrated something for me.

Two examples from today: first, it was my daughter's first birthday birthday party. I had ordered a cake from my local grocery store and called this morning to enquire if it was done so I could pick it up. The answer I received? “It should be.” “It should be?” I queried, thinking this was an inadequate response, and wondering how the person on the other end of the line would feel if the tables were turned. Politely, I asked her to check for me. Minutes passed, I was left on hold before having someone else from the wrong department pick up and cut me off. I called back, asked politely again, this time receiving the somewhat alarming response “what did it look like?” Eventually, after I imagined a child's birthday party sans cake, we got to the bottom of it. The cake was finished. Glory be. I thought to myself, if the person on the phone had thought for one second “What if it was my little girl's first birthday and I was running around doing last minute errands. Would I be stressed? Would I need to be reassured everything was OK?” I would hazard a guess that most, if not all people, given the opportunity to truly see their life in yours, would change their attitude immediately.

Second example, much more serious, but the same problem. We live close to a major thoroughfare and traffic zips by at a slightly alarming pace twenty-four hours a day. Tonight we heard a sickening crunch, then the blare of a horn that went on for an eerily long time. I knew right away an accident had happened and leapt up to see what had happened. A car had rear-ended another car and was fleeing the scene. The damage to the first car was extensive, EMS and fire trucks were dispatched to rescue the driver and clean up the mess. There were two things that were distressing about what we saw. Of course, a hit and run is troubling because we like to believe in the idea of law and order; that accidents happen and people need to held accountable. But what got me more riled up was seeing the way other motorists handled themselves in the face of this inconvenience. We watched cars circle around the fire crews, crossing into oncoming lanes, weaving between pedestrians trying to help and snarling traffic in the opposite direction. They were endangering fire crews, paramedics, pedestrians other drivers and themselves, but the overwhelming note seemed to be “I need to get where I am going.”

If we can, for one second, put ourselves in the place of another, our lives change immediately. If you imagined that it was your relative in the accident, or that your husband was working that night as a firefighter on the side of the road, you'd stop and think. You'd see that we all have connection.

Whether it's something as trivial as an indifferent or rude service person, BP oil's gushing underwater well, the G20 riot police, or corrupt bankers, the problem is the same. We don't seem to care about our fellow human or see any reason to reach out to them. Why is that? Is this a new phenomenon or is this something that humans have always struggled with? Am I just getting old and grouchy?

We all want to love and be loved, live our lives as healthy as we can be, have a roof over our heads and meaningful work, or at least gainful employment. We all want this, but many of us don't have this. Perhaps if this were clear in everyone's heart and mind, those desires would become a reality for all. We are more alike than we are unalike.

We are all connected.

Ashamed

It has taken me a full week to write this blog, because this week, I am embarrassed to be a Canadian. It's the first time I can ever, truly, say that. I used to hold the self-satisfied smugness that nothing as disgusting and disappointing as last weekend's G20 summit crackdown could ever happen here in Canada. I remember a friend at UCLA ribbing me about how Canadians walk around feeling so self-satisfied and virtuous and how it drove her crazy. I figured she was just jealous that a kid with a backpack and a Canadian flag could pass through countries where Americans were unwelcome. We were the country that everyone wanted to be. We were nice, kind and compassionate about our fellow citizens. We had gun control and universal healthcare. Michael Moore held us up as an example of a caring, democratic society. I thought we were different, I really did.

I was so wrong, and the depth of the sadness and anger I feel about what happened is surprising, even to me.

Perhaps the massive price tag for the event should have been a tip-off. Where did we think that money was being spent? On fences? Sure, they were extensive, but 1.4 billion dollars worth? After the weekend, it's clear where the money was spent – on police officers, enough police officers to form a small army that flooded out on our streets in a staggering show of force. I hope they have some of that money left over for the mass of lawsuits about to be filed.

I took my family outside the city for the summit because we live within a few blocks of the red zone. I did this because we have a one-year-old child and I had a strange sense of foreboding about the entire event. I mistakenly feared that the summit itself would be the source of the trouble, that putting that many important world leaders together in such a small place was a really bad idea. I had no idea that the sense of doom I felt would be the death of freedom, of our innocence as a country and of our reputation on the world stage. Even Iran condemned our attack on human rights!

First let me say that I do not support the black bloc method of protest. I know they are trying to bring attention to “big money”, “big government” and break down the system because they believe it is fundamentally flawed and they feel they need violence to get people's attention. I believe that things need to change as well, but I do not believe that the way to get anything done about it is to smash in the window of a Starbucks. To smash in the window of a local, unknown, retailer is just stupid and irresponsible. What exactly are you railing against? Big dollar stores?

What I do support, however, is peaceful protest. Walk our streets, chant your message, raise your placards and protest! We even had a “designated protest area” in Toronto at Queen's Park. People were told, well in advance of the summit that they could peacefully assemble there. So, if a law abiding, conscientious citizen wanted to do the right thing, they went to Queen's Park and stated their case. The problem? By late afternoon on Saturday, storm troopers rolled down the streets and flushed the lawfully protesting citizens out. Often violently. If you were watching the news coverage on Saturday, the thugs were the police. It was the police that were assembling with violent intent. It was a disgusting abuse of power.

While police cars burned and a handful of hooligans paralysed the city, where were these thousands of police? If the intent was to protect property and people, then why was Saturday such a woeful failure? Why did the police allow rioters to assemble and burn cars and property? Where were they then? The cynic in me says that the police allowed the cars to burn to show just how “bad” the protesters were and that they were justified in their show of force. Of course we will never know why things went down the way they did on Saturday.

What disturbed me most was Sunday. Approximately 100 protestors were boxed in by two rows of riot police at Queen and Spadina and not allowed to disperse, forced to stand in the driving rain for more than 2 hours Sunday night. Their crime? Walking on a public street, protesting. Nothing was burned, broken or destroyed. No one was bullied, heckled or taunted. They were just walking. You can read about journalist Michael Talbot's odyssey here. He was arrested and confined in the ad hoc detention centre along with mothers, fathers, kids, curious teenagers and residents of the area who had the nerve to leave their homes for groceries. It was shocking, disturbing and frightening. What had happened to our fair city? Was this retribution for the events on the weekend? Had the police lost their minds?

Equally shocking and disappointing were the reactions of Torontonians to this outrageous abuse of power. Most blamed the peaceful protesters, many even going so far as to suggest that they “got what they deserved” or that somehow they were whiners because they didn't like being held in dog kennels overnight for a crime they didn't commit. The comments I've read made me despair for our society – we clearly are only interested in our own little corner of the world and don't want it upset. “We want to shop” should be the mantra of the apathetic. Don't cause trouble, don't speak up and don't question anything. That's the real message that Canadians sent out this week.

The greatest irony is that many people don't see what really happened this week. We lost fundamental freedoms that are enshrined in our Charter of Rights. Our Chief of Police lied to us. Our city became a police state. This was a dark, dark weekend in the history of Toronto and one I know will haunt me for a long time to come.

We have the right to peaceful protest. We have the right to freedom of expression. We have the right to walk on our streets. Tens of thousands of our forefathers died protecting this right. We probably all have a relative that died fighting in the world wars; Canada has a history of coming to the defence of others. We all say we believe in freedom, but we are unwilling or unable to see that what happened this week was an assault on our freedom and an assault on Canada.

Burn a car? Get arrested. Break a window, threaten a cop, get arrested. That is just and right.

But march peacefully and get arrested? Assemble legally and get arrested? This is unjust and must be challenged. We cannot quietly let this slide. We must hold our leaders accountable for what happened. Harper is such an easy target in all this I won't waste time discussing it here. But McGuinty was surprisingly misguided and unrepentant in his secret passing of a bill to restrict our rights. When he could have called a press conference to state unequivocally that the law was being misinterpreted, he remained silent. I voted for McGuinty in the last election, but he has most certainly lost that vote.

And where are our leaders of the opposition? The only thing to come out of Ignatieff's camp this week is that “The Queen has a wonderful sense of humour.” He's asleep at the wheel and is seriously hurting the Liberals chance of getting back into office. The only leaders going on record about this are the NDP's Jack Layton and Green Party leader Elizabeth May. Pay attention to this, folks, and remember it at election time.

Freedom doesn't disappear overnight. A just, democratic society is a precious thing that needs to be protected, even if we don't like or agree with those within it. I may think that a protester is an idiot for behaving differently than I do, or wonder why someone would come down just to watch, but I agree that he or she has the right to do it.

And that's the crux of it – we are an open, democratic society where peaceful protest should be welcome, not squashed under the jackboot of the authorities.

Let's not lose our Canada, at least the one we can all remember.

Growing up Psychic

One of the people that we interviewed for our first book was Sloan Bella, celebrity psychic to the stars, based out of LA. What we didn't write about in our book is that I met Sloan many years ago, as a fellow tarot reader and clairvoyant. Over the course of my adult life, I've read tarot for clients and done clairvoyant readings as well, on and off. I think that the gift in our family comes down from our crazy Irish ancestors, but who knows? All we know is that every action needs to be done for the common good, so we've always functioned from that spiritual base. Always trying to convert the desire to receive for the self alone (selfishness) into the desire to share (spiritual growth), so to speak.
My son is a very sensive child, and spiritual as well. Last night he had a dream, and he remembered it very vividly this morning. He had dreamt that he was at school (which is a new age, hippie school run by Bahai) and a new teacher had come in, with a scroll for each student. The scroll allowed the student to shapeshift into an animal, and my son's animal was dog. He used the scroll to change into a rat terrier, and he experienced the world as that animal. He woke up happy and invigorated.

Now doesn't that describe the attitude of a dog? Being in the moment, happy to show love, have fun and just be.

I wish that for everyone in the world right now. As we wrestle with the demons that unchecked desire to receive for the self alone (selfishness) have made within the world right now, we all need to take a breath, find the joy, and just be, if only for a moment.

Then get back to fighting the good fight, healing the Earth, and healing ourselves.

Blessings to you all,

Tracey

Does Everyone Hate Their Job?

I often listen to people's conversations when I stand in line. I don't do this to be nosy – the identity of these folks is totally irrelevant to me; I do it to understand people and to pick up ideas for stories and characters. I was taught to do this at UCLA by one of my excellent profs, Hal Ackerman, when I was doing my MFA in Screenwriting. Hal's idea was that writers are students of human nature and what better way to get to know humans than to pay attention to what they're doing and saying? It was a kind of cultural anthropology; Jane Goodall for people. It almost always yields great insights or great humour.

For the same reason I find Facebook fascinating. Not long ago, researchers released a brief study that showed that women are more unhappy AFTER an engagement than before it. They gleaned this by watching their status messages. Apparently engaged women post a lot of negative messages. The same was not true of men. Yikes.

I decided to do an informal survey of the status messages of my friends about their work. It's really, really surprising and a bit depressing how many people hate their jobs. From the brutal commute that Torontonian's endure, to wishing Wednesdays were Fridays – hell I've even seen Monday messages that say they wish it was Friday.

We are clearly not happy campers.

When you think about how many hours, days, weeks, months and years we spend in our jobs, not to mention getting to our jobs, this is a really sad state of affairs. If you spend just one hour each way on your commute (a quick jaunt for Torontonians who average a staggering 80 minutes each way ) you will spend 6 extra weeks of full time days every year “working” on your commute. This makes no sense to your body, your car, the environment or your sanity.

So why do we do it?

Plain and simple, it's fear. It's fear that keeps us in jobs we don't like. People will almost always say “money” is the reason, but if you dig down just a bit further, it's fear of not having money (and all the accompanying stress) that keeps us at jobs we don't like. It's understandable – we have mortgages, kids, loans, groceries. We need to keep the wolves at bay.

But here's something interesting to think about. Many of us have gone through a layoff in our lives. At first, it feels like someone has punched you in the stomach – you're winded, you're shocked. It's like getting dumped. Then, given a little time, it hurts less. You start to bounce back, get out into the world and look for something else to do. Another company to date. If you're lucky (and this is not going to seem logical) it takes more than a few days for this to happen. If you're lucky, you'll take the time to get to know yourself and figure out what it is that you really want to do. If you're lucky, you won't put your head back in the yoke and start slogging it out again immediately, complaining about what you do and wishing your life away as you look forward to your next weekend. And let's face it – those weekends are never as good as we hope they'll be.

So what does all this have to do with Successful Rebels?

“This is what we want for you – to find your true, authentic self, and have the “rebelliousness” to stay true to that vision of yourself, without being swayed by pressures from friends, family or society in general.

The most liberating part of the current economic (and soon to be societal) meltdown is that it has become clear that there isn’t one “right” way to do things, and that in fact those that have “toed the line” and “made the right choices” have been those worst affected. The time is now to cast off the shackles and be who you are, without regret. Let us show you those that have done this and are happy and successful enough to share their stories with you.”

It's not easy, quick or popular to radically overhaul your life. You will encounter resistance – it's all to be expected. You may have to sell your house, your car or everything you own. You may have to leave the big city, or a bad relationship. But at least you will have the life that you designed, and not one that you're “putting up with until Friday”.

Read more about people that live their lives authentically at www.successfulrebel.com

And be inspired...I know we were.

-- Melissa

Interview with Jodie Emery

Tracey: I first met Marc and Jodie Emery at the Toronto Freedom Festival 2010, held every year on May 1st in Queen’s Park, which is in downtown Toronto. The turnout was amazing this year… 40,000 people asking for freedom of expression, gathering together in a peaceful protest. I was there to show support for Neev of CALM, an interview subject in our book “The Successful Rebel”, written with my sister Melissa Ireland, and a figure in the current shifting sands of medical cannabis legislation.

As my husband and I walked through the massive crowd, I suddenly saw Marc Emery, the so called “Prince of Pot” who was currently awaiting an extradition order to the States, along with his lovely wife Jodie. Marc has been a very public activist for the end to prohibition of Cannabis, and his selling of seeds to the United States compassion clubs has gotten him into hot water with the US Feds. We wished him well, as he is a very respected activist and humanitarian. One of the last things that he said to us was “the media always talks about how my company made millions of dollars, but they don’t talk about the millions of dollars that we donated to activists in the States that changed Medical Marijuana laws to help the chronically ill and dying. It was never about the money. Losing possessions is nothing, if you fight for a just cause.” He also suggested that I interview Jodie for the next book that we’re working on “the Successful Female Rebel”.

I never imagined that less than a month after that meeting I would get a chance to interview Jodie for our book, and it would be about Marc Emery sitting in a US Jail.

Here's a bit of that encounter for you to enjoy. The full interview will, of course, be in our next book The Successful Female Rebel.

Tracey: Jodie, thank you very much for doing this interview today. I know that things have been incredibly busy since your husband Marc Emery was extradited to the United States. In book that we’re working on now, we’re trying to give a voice to the female rebels that we respect, and discussing how and why people get to the point where they become activists and rebels. What situations in rebels’ lives have keyed it off, and how people can channel their rebellion in a positive manner. Do you mind giving us a brief rundown of what you are doing now that you want people to know about and causes that you want them to rally around?

Jodie: Yes. We want to end prohibition, and we want to get rid of the Conservative government.

Tracey: What do you think that this extradition says about the relationship between Canada and the USA?

Jodie: That we’re being deeply integrated, and that our law enforcement is working together more than people know.

Tracey: Do you feel that this is something that we should be worried about? Because personally, I find it confusing that the United States has a president like Obama, who is a liberal and a humanitarian, and yet they are jailing Marc Emery who provided seeds to most of the medical compassion centres that are in the process of becoming legal in that same country. Don’t you find it kind of a strange dichotomy, hearing that California is in the process of legalizing cannabis and yet you have something like this with Marc going on?

Jodie: Yes, it’s ironic that Marc sent seeds and money that led to the medical marijuana state initiatives being passed, allowing for States to let patients use marijuana legally. The federal government in the United States has not approved medical marijuana use. The only thing that Obama has done is issue a memorandum to all federal agencies to respect state rights whenever it comes to difference between state and federal law.

Tracey: Now, I know that you’re running in the next federal election in the riding of Vancouver South, but what party are you representing?

Jodie: The Green Party of Canada.

Tracey: Any word on when the election might be?

Jodie: It’s supposed to be a fixed election date, but this government doesn’t follow the fixed election laws.

Tracey: They also don’t follow the freedom of information laws! When you see all the information that is redacted in their communications, it’s quite frightening.

Jodie: *laughs* Well, I call them the “Consecretive Government”!

Tracey: When you requested information about Marc’s case and when it comes, it’s all redacted, what do you do?

Jodie: Yeah, we asked for all information about Marc’s case shared between law enforcement and justice in Canada and the United States and they got back to us well past the legal deadline, and they said that there were over sixty thousand pages of information, but that most couldn’t be provided except for about sixty pages that we did receive. The vast majority of that was blacked out, except for a few email addresses of federal justice department officials.

Tracey: Wow. I find that frightening. What do you feel is going to be the most important platform that you’re going to be running on in the federal election?

Jodie: Ending prohibition.

========

What do you think? We want to hear from you. Please comment on this blog, or contact us through http://www.thesuccessfulrebel.com/.

Raising a Successful Female Rebel

Last night, as I watched my daughter trash the living room with reckless abandon, I was struck by something. At ten months, she doesn't yet have a command of language, which means, she hasn't yet “understood” that she is weak, delicate or lesser than. She hasn't yet learned that boys are stronger and that little girls are somehow more vulnerable than little boys. Of course, I don't believe any of this. And I certainly don't want her to believe this.

But how often do I amend my behaviour towards her because she is a girl and not a boy? Charlotte is our first baby, so I don't know what little boys are like. I don't know how differently I'd treat a little boy over a little girl. My husband told me, sadly, that he wouldn't feel as comfortable cooing and lavishing affection on a little boy the way he does on her (of course this is all academic – I believe he would be just as loving). This is from a pretty enlightened guy – he'll be the primary caregiver when I return to work next week from mat leave. How do we do this to our little people so easily and what impact does it have on them?

Even the best intentioned parents are going to treat their children slightly differently, because we've all been raised that way. Apparently, women are stronger, pound for pound of muscle, than men. We live longer, we handle pain better. Of course we don't reach the size and bulk they do, so we are therefore, “weaker”. What will serve her best in the future anyway? Does physical size and strength really mean anything in our world now?

I hope that she will be fair and wise, kind and disciplined. I hope that she will be strong of spirit and trust her body to do the right thing and treat it appropriately. I hope that she will personify the very best of a Successful Female Rebel...

...most of all, I hope that I don't screw her up along the way!

Melissa

Toronto Freedom Festival 2010

On May 1st, 2010, we participated in the Toronto Freedom Festival and Global Marijuana March at Queen's Park in Toronto. Over 40,000 participants showed up, and the turnout was a world's record!

Pictures and videos are up now at the Toronto Freedom Festival's facebook:

http://www.facebook.com/#!/group.php?gid=8667853850

We had the good fortune to meet Marc Emery, the Canadian seed bank activist, and wish him well on his continued fight for access to medication for the chronically ill and dying. All and all, it was a fantastic turnout and a fantastic day.

Blessings to you all,

Tracey and Melissa xoxo
http://www.thesuccessfulrebel.com

Successful Rebel Inspiration

Just found this amazing quote:

" This hour in history needs a dedicated circle of transformed non conformists. The saving of our world from pending doom will come not from the actions of a conforming majority, but from the creative maladjustment of a transformed minority." - Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Feel good about your rebellion and non conformity, and use it for the good of all, including yourself.

Have a blessed week everyone!

Tracey and Melissa xoxo

Return of the Divine Masculine...

Philosopher Matthew Fox speaking out about the need for positive role models for men, if the human race is to survive.
I'm so happy that someone understands how important our actions are in this crucial moment in history.

Man up.

Awesome video below of his recent speech on this topic.

http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=TrclOGxUM6Q

How to Save Big Bucks on Advertising and Hammer Your Message Home at the Same Time

Advertising and marketing is a huge outlay of cash for any dealer. During these tough times when the gross in each vehicle seems to be moving steadily downward, it’s always a great idea to look at all the expenses in a dealership and see where you can tighten up. A huge area for improvement in most dealerships is in the advertising budget. We all seem to spend too much without seeing a direct result, and with a full page ad in most major newspapers costing around 1500 to 2000 bucks per insertion, using a more customized approach to advertising is just good business sense.

Last year when writing the self help book, “The Successful Rebel: Getting What You Want Without Losing Who You Are”, I had the good fortune to interview Ernie Boch Jr., the number one Honda dealer and number three Toyota dealer in America. Ernie had a lot of excellent tips about staying true to yourself while being a success in business, and he had a few points that really helped me cut down on our advertising expense and get a better return on investment at our own dealership.

1. All of your ads should show the personality of the dealer and the employees. People love to feel that they know the person that they’re turning their hard earned money over to.
If you put in a cute or funny picture of the dealer, the sales manager, the dealer’s dog, whatever, it cuts through the clutter of all of the corporate looking ads that most businesses rely on. Ernie Boch Jr. is a master of these types of ads. He dresses up like a waitress, a nerd, a punk rocker or the Coppertone kid, and centres his ads on the gag. People buy from him. Obviously, this tactic works. Not many dealers have their own private jet. Ernie does.

2. Direct marketing mailers should follow the same formula. Personalized and individual. Make the public aware of who you are, and they will think of you first when they go to buy a car. People always feel more comfortable with a known quantity, so make your dealership someplace where they feel that they belong, before they even step in the door.

3. If you have hobbies, highlight them in some of your softer advertising, such as newsletters. Ernie Boch Jr. has a rock band called Ernie and the Automatics, which he formed with two former members of the band Boston. Music is Ernie’s passion, and he does a lot of great charity work by talking about gigs and fundraisers in his newsletter. Once again, the human touch brings big rewards. Let your customers know about you, what you stand for, who you help in your charitable pursuits and they will remember YOU when it comes time to buy or service their vehicles.

Pretty simple, don’t you think? Make your advertising personalized, so that the public feels that they know you. If you do this, you can cut back on the size of your ads and get the same results, which means more money in your jeans at the end of the day. Have some fun and give it a try!

Originally published on CanadianAutoNews.ca

Ville Valo interview in Toronto!!

Hey guys;

I just found out that we're going to be able to do an interview with Ville Valo when HIM comes to Toronto on March 31st, 2010.

Any suggestions for questions? Anything you're dying to know from Mr. Valo?

We're really excited to have this opportunity for a face to face chat with the Finnish frontman. I'm sure that we'll have time to talk about feminist icon Saint Caterina of Alexandria, an 18 year old female philosopher who went up against 50 Roman philosophers and managed to convert them to her way of thinking. The song "Catherine Wheel" on Ville's new album "Screamworks: Love in Theory and Practice" alludes to her story, as Caterina was martyred on a Catherine Wheel.

Ville Valo always manages to educate and inform with his interviews. It's one of the things that his fans love him for!

Blessings on your New Year...

I am sending out blessings and love to all of the readers who are being so supportive with their emails, word of mouth, and awesome reviews for the book on Amazon ...We have some interviews lined up and if any of you guys want to recommend us to whatever media for an interview, I'd be happy to spread the word for the freaks, rebels and non conformists.

Yoko Ono sent me the answer to another question a couple of days ago, so once again, that's been mind blowing. Three questions answered, one per week. It's like performance art.

I'm sending a book to Kat Von D at High Voltage Tattoo, as I'm asking for her to do an interview for the next book in the series, The Successful Female Rebel. She's a big HIM and Ville Valo fan, so I think that she would be very inspirational to us crazy, rebellious women. Send me your good energy, and maybe I can snag a few minutes of her time to help us sisters with some rebellious success tips!

You can follow the book at http://www.thesuccessfulrebel.com . There's some stuff up on the media page now as well.

Tracey xo